داستان خنده دار و جوک های انگلیسی

Mr.Bean Science

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I was stuck in ELEVATOR for 3 hrs

Due to electric failure

Mr.Bean:

Ya me too

I was stuck on ESCALATOR for 5 hrs

15 پسندیده

elevator آسانسور

escalator پله برقی

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از شدت بی مزگی خیلی خنده دار بود😂

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Mr and Mrs Taylor had one child. He was a boy, he was 7years old, and his name was Pat. Now Mrs Taylor was expecting another child. Pat had seen babies in other people's houses and not liked them very much, so he was not delighted about the news that there was soon going to be one in his house too. One evening Mr and Mrs Taylor were making plans for the baby's arrival. "This house won't be big enough for us all when the baby comes. I suppose we'll have to find a larger house and move to that," said Mr Taylor finally. Pat had been playing outside, but he came into the room just then and said, "What are you talking about? "We were saying that we'll have to move to another house now, beacuse the new baby's coming" his mother answered. "It's no use," said Pat hopelessly. "He'll follow us there

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خاصیت مستربین همینه دیگه :joy: :joy:

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من Last Week Tonight رو خیلی دنبال میکنم بسیار جالبه. بعضی از تیکه های خنده دارشو براتون میذارم.

این تیکش در رابطه با ترامپ و دیواریه که میخواد برای مرز مکزیک بسازه. نمیدونم چقدر در جریان انتخابات آمریکا بودین ولی ترامپ رو این دیوار خیلی مانور داد که انتقاد های فراوانی هم بهش میشد که به درد نمیخوره. یجا خود ترامپ بد جور سوتی میده که در این ویدئو ببینین :grinning:

watch as Donald Trump inadvertently stumbles his way into a key realization
ببینید چطور دونالد ترامپ به صورت سهوی خودش رو به یه حقیقت کلیدی سوق میده (منظورش اینه ببینید دونالد ترامپ عجب سوتی میده!)

so you take precast plank it comes 30 feet along 40 feet long 50 feet long
(کاری نداره که) تخته های آماده رو میگیری که ۳۰ فوت، ۴۰ فوت و یا حتی ۵۰ فوت هستن

there’s no ladder going over that. if they ever get up there they’re in trouble. cuz there’s no way to get down. maybe a rope!
هیچ نردبونی نیست که بتونه تا اون بالا بره! حتی اگر هم یه وقت به اون بالا رسیدن به مشکل بر میخورن. چون راهی برای پایین اومدن نیست. البته شاید با یه طناب بشه! :))))

yeah! yes! may be a rope! yes! yes! your brilliant plan has been undone by mankind’s third invention

بله! بله! شاید با یه طناب بشه! بله بله! طرح خلاقانه ی شما با استفاده از سومین اختراع بشریت بیفایده میشه!

https://streamable.com/svnks

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من خیلی متوجه نشدمش تا اینکه چند بار تکرارش کردم :yum:
:neutral_face:
البته منظورم اینه که ی سری لغاتشو نمیدونستم چی میگه.خیلی سریع بود

4 پسندیده

@amir_hosein_mv @fdoosti @KH.GH64 زیرنویسشو به همراه ترجمه گذاشتم :slight_smile:

حالا این موضوع اینقدر احمقانه بود که یکی نوشته بود این کار فقط باعث میشه که کسب و کار نردبونهای ۵۱ فوتی رونق بگیره :rofl:

5 پسندیده

عالی شد…مرسی
:ok_hand:

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نمیدونم کتاب بیشعوری رو خوندین یا نه ولی با اینکه بیشتر از ۲۰ سال پیش نوشته شده تو ی بخشی از کتاب نویسنده درباره شخصیت ترامپ هشدار میده و از یکی از کتابهای ترامپ به عنوان کتاب مقدس بیشعورها نام میبره :joy:

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منم با چندبار تکرار کاملا متوجه شدم آمریکاییها عجله دارن خیلی تند حرف میزنن

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**Prescription**  
  A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor's office. After the check-up, the doctor took
    the wife aside and said, "If you don't do the following, your husband will surely die."
    "1-Each morning, makes him a healthy breakfast and sends him off to work in a good mood."
    "2-At lunchtime, make him a warm, nutritious meal and put him in a good form of mind before
    he goes back to work."
    "3-For dinner, make an especially nice meal and don't burden him with household chores."
    At home, the husband asked his wife what the doctor had told her. "You're going to die." She
    replied!

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Jack was attending the funeral service of the richest man in the city.
Beacause he was weeping bitterly, a man asked sadly, ” was the deceases one of the dear relatives? “No” said jack.
” Then why are you crying?” asked the stranger. ” Because I’m not one of the relatives,” answered jack.

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IMG_20170815_024631

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K G: General Pershing

General Pershing was a famous American officer. He was in the American army, and fought in Europe in the First World War.

After he died, some people in his home town wanted to remember him, so they’ put up a big statue of him on a horse.

There was a school near the statue, and some of the boys passed it every day on their way to school and again on their way home. After a few months some of them began to say, ‘Good morning, Pershing’, whenever they passed the statue, and soon all the boys at the school were doing this.

One Saturday one of the smallest of these boys was walking to the shops with his mother when he passed the statue. He said, ‘Good morning, Pershing’ to it, but then he stopped and said to his mother, ‘I like Pershing very much, Ma, but who’s
that funny man on his back?’

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image
:joy::joy::joy::sunglasses:

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سلام
خیلی پیشرفت کردید نسبت به روزای اول ، آفرین
دیگه کم کم تمرکز کنید واسه شرکت کردن تو لتس تاک

2 پسندیده

سپاس🌹
سعی میکنم…

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:joy::joy:

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Iranian mothers :joy::fearful:

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