تمرین رایتینگ - جراحات عاطفی

[matinrohany]

Hi there, guys!
Welcome to the next writing challenge.

This week, we’re going to talk about “trauma”.
Trauma means a deeply distressing or disturbing experience, like the death of a loved one.

Now, first of all, please remember, try not to let it exceed 200 words.
Secondly, if you have no idea what to write about, don’t worry. You can simply answer the questions (there’s no need to answer all of them, though), but again, don’t forget to include your ideas too.
Next, if you want to receive feedback, let me know.

Questions:

1. What is the worst thing that has happened to you?
2. What are some common traumatic events of these days?
3. Can traumatic events make people stronger or bring them closer to each other?
4. How can you help someone who is suffering from a trauma?
5. Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is an anxiety disorder caused by very stressful, frightening or distressing events. What are the symptoms? How can we deal with it?
6. …

Alright, good luck!
Have fun.

---

پرسش‌ها:

۱. بدترین اتفاقی (روحی) که تجربه کرده‌اید، چه بوده است؟
۲. برخی از رایج‌ترین ضربات آسیب‌های عاطفی این روزها چه هستند؟
۳. ضرباحت روحی چطور می‌توانند اشخاص را قوی‌تر و یا به یکدیگر نزدیک‌تر کنند؟
۴. چطور می‌توانیم به افرادی که از جراحات عاطفی رنج می‌برند کمک کنیم؟
۵. اختلال استرسی پس از آسیب روانی (PTSD)، سندرمی است که پس از مشاهده، تجربهٔ مستقیم یا شنیدن یک عامل استرس‌زا و آسیب‌زای شدید روی می‌دهد. آیا علائم آن را می‌دانید؟ چطور می‌توان با آن دست و پنجه نرم کرد؟

موفق باشید!

[gisoo13]

Hey.

@matinrohany

Can traumatic events make people stronger or bring them closer to each other?

I’m not sure. It’s totally a matter of who you are. Whether you let yourself be devoured by your grief, making yourself blind to the vivid and stark coloring of life and seeing only and only the gray and the black. Or, you come to accept it. Not easily or quickly, of course. You grieve and cry. After all, “pain demands to be felt”. But you do move on eventually.

There is this scene in this book I’m rereading that the girl accuses the boy of accepting the death of his friend, Jem, and tells him that she can’t understand him. The boy returns:

“And I think that you do not understand that sometimes the only choice is between acceptance and madness.”

I wonder, most of the time, that it’s all there is to life. It’s either acceptance, acceptance of who you are, what you have, what you’ve lost and what you’ve done, or madness. You have no choice but to go on with your life. Sometimes, you are required to be strong and that’s all. Dwelling on things, specially morbid thoughts like death and loss, does no one no good. In fact, dwelling on yesterday and the things you’ve done, said, lost and anything that you can apply and use the past tense on them, is no good. They should not be what occpies your head. I wish we could take out an eraser and clean the page off any unwanted ink spot or ugly scrawl, but we can’t. Life can’t be a polished masterpiece. It’s an ugly canvas of black that is smeared here and there with blue and green and red by the brush in your slender fingers.

It is also in this book that I read,
“Ave atque vale… Hail and farewell. He had never given much thought to the words before, he had never thought about why they were not just a farewell but also a greeting. Every meeting led to a parting, and so it would, as long as life was mortal. In every meeting there was some of the sorrow of parting, but in every parting there was some joy of the meeting as well.
He would not forget the joy.”

Nothing comes free. You shall have both, joy and sadness, or you shall forsake both of them.

Thank you so much, I was in desperate need of writing.

[razieamiri]

Hi

1. Last year I lost my grandfather. I really loved him but unfortunately, he passed away.

2. Todays in the world and specifically in our country, a lot of people die every day because of the coronavirus. So I think losing someone is the common traumatic event of these days.

3. It depends on each person and that event. Sometimes yes, after a traumatic people know the value of everything and appreciate them.

4. I can not help but recommend him/her to visit a psychologist. It would definitely be helpful.

I think I answered too short. I will be thankful if I have your feedback.

[dorsa48]

ادامه دادن بحث از تمرین رایتینگ - جراحات عاطفی:

Hii
Bad things happened to me for example when my grandpa died, when I couldn’t got satisfying result at Konkor, when my best friends left me. The worst feeling that I had are loneliness and not confident and felling out of community, which I think are common these days. Especially among the young peoples. Another common traumatic events are lacking of hope and motivation. Eventually any individual person has its special sorrow.
I think a good way to help someone to deal with their (مطمئن نیستم درست استفاده کردم از their. منظورم ضمیر سوم شخص مفرد بدون اشاره به جنسیت هست.) trauma is just to be there for their. I mean to show that you love and care about that person.
I don’t know much about the PTSD. But after experiencing something stressful and frightening and depressing, I think we should have some time to grif and exept the truth, then move on and don’t over think about it. Which isn’t easy.
I have this weird impression that we are not depress because of some thing, we feel awkward because we are sad. We don’t expect sadness as a natural thing in life.
Please give me fidback on my writing

[Mahshid103]

If i wanna write about trauma , i have to be as detailed as i can with what happened and how it made me feel , especially emotionally !

If you search in Google you may easily find some useless ways that most counselors insist on them :
1: Accept your emotions _ all of them
2: take a deep breath (lol)
3: give yourself some space
And …
But have they ever asked themselves how it feels to endure that feeling by themselves in real life not some collegiate books that describe trauma without any sense.

I remember about 3 months ago my mother’s uncle passed away , i can sincerely say it was the first time i saw my mom desperately sad . Her uncle died in a woeful way , It was difficult for my mother to understand why such a beautiful life would be taken as such as young age . It was the time that i came to know how it’s like to lose our loved ones .

Sometimes people need permission to be sad , to cry and also they wanna punish themselves for being depressed but what’s the problem ? Can they cry , lie on bed or snuggle their pets ? ( i bet you have one)
Yes they can do all those things but untill when ? Forever ?
Sometimes we have to lean up against one another . We have eachother and everyone deserves to be happy . Even if you are the poorest human in the world , deep down, inside your heart you feel happiness that God foisted it .

"Everything that happens to you is rife with misfortune , joy and experience ". Lemony Snicket
Our whole life is a journey , it depends on us , how we handle and cross problems

Thank you so much for giving me feedback .

[mortezadorry]

Hi dear Matin
How is everything going bro?
The worst thing that has happened to me is about my first experience to love someone which I already has told you so I tell you my second worst experience which is about losing my grandma around a decade ago. It was devastating for my family and we were shocked, I had many great memories with her in my childhood that after she passed away I reviewed those sweet memories.
Grandparents are precious gifts which gather whole relatives together.
I bet all worst experiences are about losing someone or a breakup in early relationships

Some common trumatic events of these days are illnesses and diseases which make us weak and it’s really frightening and frustrating.
Personally each time I become ill which is inevitable, my life becomes darker and darker because it makes my situation worse.

Trumatic experiences can either make us weaker or stronger, it depends on our mentality.
If I have a victim mentality and after a terrible experience I feel pity for myself and consider myself as a victim all the time and avoid any exertion or effort to improve, it makes me devastated. But if I have a proactive mentality and take 100% responsibility of my life and become better gradually then every terrible experience might be a great lesson.
There’s a quote from Buddha which says:
For any trumatic event, if we think about lessons which we learned, it benefits us. but if we always consider what we lost, it makes us miserable
My suggestion to someone who is suffering from a truma is fight hard and instead of feeling sorry and pity for yourself, take one hundred percent responsibility for your life

To pass any disorder which has tremendous amount of anxiety, I recommend exercising like running, swimming, having teammates is even better cycling or mountaineering is great.
Thanks heaps for reading my writing

[Nargesiammm]

Hi there
How it is going!
Well trauma it’s an uncontrollable thought about event or how I could say it’s an emotional response to a terrible event like an accident and… That immediately after the event shock are typical. While many sources of trauma are physically violent in nature. Some of the common sources of trauma include : depression, rape, suffering from anxiety, terrifying memories,
Personally after some one scammer my father to embezzled our houses (I have to say after he destroyed our live) , those time I felt really depressed and I just cried. It was terrible experience, all my nights passed with nightmare
of him but after a while I became a silent girl when I saw my father was suffering I decided to became silent, be strong just study my lessons took my mind off the thoughts. The stage of following a traumatic event is often a silence period after that people refuse to talk about what happened to them, they just thinking and struggle with them self. They might feel guilty. This may be due to a number of things including : isolation, sham and confusion.
From my point of view this days some of the traumatic events are car accidents or family violence, after car accident they imagine that moments about 100000 times in their mind and about family violence which is one of the most important trauma that children involved with it.
No not at all I think it can’t bring people closer to each other In my opinion as a person who pass this hard circumstance it does make you stronger for suffering another injuries of life because life is full of ups and downs It’s like a roller-coaster.
First of all you have to keep in touch with a consultant and use her /him advice. Don’t listen to other people advice they are unable to help you, they can hurt you by their wrong helps and ways, all in all don’t trust them.
Post traumatic stress disorder as you explained is a mental health condition that’s triggered by terrifying event. Symptoms may include nightmare and…

Thanks I will appreciate your feedback

[Ghabel]

Hi there,

@matinrohany

What is the worst thing that has happened to you?

I was on the verge of losing my spouse in a car accident on a rainy night. Thank God it went well. But its effect remained with me for a long time. I was having nightmares, could not sleep well and I was feeling depressed and thinking a lot about it.

@matinrohany

What are some common traumatic events of these days?

1. Feeling insecure, afraid of illness, and losing family members due to covid19.
2. Depression due to reduced contact and social relationships.
3. News explosion, we don’t live on an island alone. Whether we like it or not, different news comes to us. Some of them have profoundly bad effects on our lives.
   The economic problem, career stresses, and legal troubles are additional problems.

@matinrohany

Can traumatic events make people stronger or bring them closer to each other?

It depends on the personality of the people. Suffering from trauma may make us stronger or weaker. How do you deal with the trauma, and how much can you accept that. The only way to tolerate is acceptance and then it brings us to the next level which is building a strong character and mentality.
After the trauma, we may think that we should appreciate those around us more and don’t take them for granted.

@matinrohany

How can you help someone who is suffering from a trauma?

Don’t forget People react differently to trauma. Traumatic events cause different reactions. Some people feel anger and irritate, some have difficulties with work or education.To help someone who is suffering from a trauma, we should be patient. It takes lots of time to recover. We should learn how to behave in different situations and educate ourselves. These people have mixed emotions, we have to accept and expect that. Moreover, try to listen to them, do not force them to talk, just ensure them, we listen when they need to talk. Furthermore, we can make an effort to provide social support, do normal things and join in social events.

@matinrohany

• Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is an anxiety disorder caused by very stressful, frightening or distressing events. What are the symptoms? How can we deal with it?
• …

Feel miserable deep down
Depression
Irritating
Sense of guilt
Sleep problems or insomnia
Memory problems
Nightmare
Fear
vulnerability
Frustration.
Some tips that help us to face PTSD:
Talk to your doctor.
Talk to your trusted person about what has happened.
Try to get back to work.
Do exercise.
Take time with your family and friends.
Expect a better future.

@matinrohany

if you want to receive feedback, let me know.

I would appreciate it, thanks in advance.

[Razieh_99]

Hi there!
We all experience our share of hard times which we think cannot be overcome! But, when we look back, those problems don’t seem as terrible as we thought. Therefore, I prefer not to label them as traumas, because no matter how hard they were to deal with, they’re all water under the bridge now. I mean, the wounds are healed and only some scars are left!

@matinrohany

How can you help someone who is suffering from a trauma?

This is a difficult one! In my experience, as an initial step, you have to know that person so well in order to recognize what can make them feel better. Some people need to be listened to, in this case you can also hug them, talk to them, maybe call them by their pet names (if it helps) and provide them with whatever they need.
On the other hand, the best way to express your sympathy to some other people (including me) is to leave them alone! Seriously, get out of the room and close the door. We would appreciate your help :)))

[matinrohany]

Hi there, Gisoo

@gisoo13

I’m not sure. It’s totally a matter of who you are. Whether you let yourself be devoured by your grief, making yourself blind to the vivid and stark coloring of life and seeing only and only the gray and the black. Or, you come to accept it. Not easily or quickly, of course. You grieve and cry. After all, “pain demands to be felt”. But you do move on eventually.

Well, yeah, I guess that’s right. Some people enjoy playing the victim all the time.

@gisoo13

“And I think that you do not understand that sometimes the only choice is between acceptance and madness.”

Beautiful

@gisoo13

but we can’t

Actually, we can. It’s a little difficult, though

@gisoo13

Life can’t be a polished masterpiece. It’s an ugly canvas of black that is smeared here and there with blue and green and red by the brush in your slender fingers.

Well said

Thank you so much for participating It was perfect, enjoyed every line.

[matinrohany]

Hi there, Razie

@razieamiri

I will be thankful if I have your feedback.

Sure, I’ll try

@razieamiri

• Last year I lost my grandfather. I really loved him but unfortunately, he passed away.

Sorry to hear that.
May he rest in peace.

@razieamiri

Todays

Today*/These days

@razieamiri

traumatic people

traumatic experience/event, people understand*…

@razieamiri

I think I answered too short.

That’s totally alright Thank you so much for participating Enjoyed your views on the matter.

[matinrohany]

Hi there, Dorsa

@dorsa48

Please give me fidback on my writing

Sure, I’ll try

@dorsa48

got

get*

@dorsa48

feeling that I had are loneliness and not confident and felling out of community

feelings* that I’ve ever experienced are loneliness, lack of confidence*, and feeling left out*

@dorsa48

I think are common these days

Yeah, agreed

@dorsa48

peoples

ones*/people*

@dorsa48

traumatic events are lacking of hope and motivation

event* is* lack of hope and motivation.

@dorsa48

(مطمئن نیستم درست استفاده کردم از their. منظورم ضمیر سوم شخص مفرد بدون اشاره به جنسیت هست.)

That’s totally correct

@dorsa48

their

them*

@dorsa48

about the PTSD

about PTSD

@dorsa48

exept

accept*

@dorsa48

over think about it

don’t overthink it*

@dorsa48

depress

depressed*

Thank you so much for participating Enjoyed your views on the matter

[matinrohany]

Hi there, Mahshid

@Mahshid103

Thank you so much for giving me feedback .

I’ll try

@Mahshid103

Her uncle died in a woeful way

Sorry to hear that…

@Mahshid103

would be taken as such as young age

is taken at such a young age

@Mahshid103

Sometimes people need permission to be sad

Well… I’m not sure about using the word “permission” here…
Maybe this?
“Sometimes we need to let people be sad”/“Sometimes people need to let themselves be sad”

@Mahshid103

Can

Can’t* (emphasizes your point)

@Mahshid103

i bet you have one

I used to have fun…

@Mahshid103

foisted

foist, actually, has a negative meaning
Maybe you can use “put” instead

@Mahshid103

Our whole life is a journey , it depends on us , how we handle and cross problems

Well said

Thank you so much for participating Really enjoyed reading your essay

[matinrohany]

Hi there, dear Morteza

@mortezadorry

How is everything going bro?

Everything is alright, thanks for asking.
How have you been?

@mortezadorry

The worst thing that has happened to me is about my first experience to love someone which I already has told you so I tell you

Oh, yeah… That was really traumatic.

@mortezadorry

losing my grandma

Sorry for your loss…

@mortezadorry

Grandparents are precious gifts which gather whole relatives together.

Yeah… they’re really sweet.

@mortezadorry

I bet all worst experiences are about losing someone or a breakup in early relationships

I have to pay thrice for my rent… That was the worst feeling ever

@mortezadorry

Personally each time I become ill which is inevitable, my life becomes darker and darker because it makes my situation worse.

Sorry to hear that…

@mortezadorry

If I have a victim mentality and after a terrible experience I feel pity for myself and consider myself as a victim all the time and avoid any exertion or effort to improve, it makes me devastated.

Totally agreed

@mortezadorry

To pass any disorder which has tremendous amount of anxiety, I recommend exercising like running, swimming, having teammates is even better cycling or mountaineering is great.

I’ve found that to be true

Thank you so much for participating As always, enjoyed your views on the matter

[gisoo13]

@matinrohany

Actually, we can. It’s a little difficult, though

I hate to ask, but how? I mean, you can’t bring back the dead for instance. Or you can’t, sometimes, win back your health. And as to other things, you can mend them, yes, but they will never be as they were before. You can not erase them completely. They will merely fade.

[matinrohany]

Hi there, Narges

@Nargesiammm

How it is going!

It’s going fine Thanks for asking

@Nargesiammm

Thanks I will appreciate your feedback

Sure, I’ll try

@Nargesiammm

it’s

is*

@Nargesiammm

shock

shocks*

@Nargesiammm

physically violent

physical violence*

@Nargesiammm

(I have to say after he destroyed our live)

I’m really sorry to hear that…

@Nargesiammm

some one scammer my father to embezzled our houses

a fraud stole our houses/swindled my father out of his possessions

@Nargesiammm

those time

that time*/those times*

@Nargesiammm

terrible

a* terrible

@Nargesiammm

became

become*

@Nargesiammm

thinking

think*

@Nargesiammm

them self.

themselves*

@Nargesiammm

this

these*

@Nargesiammm

family violence

you can use the term “domestic violence”

@Nargesiammm

pass

has passed

@Nargesiammm

another

other*

@Nargesiammm

people

people’s*

@Nargesiammm

terrifying

a terrifying*

Thank you so much for participating and thanks for sharing your experience with us
Hope everything goes well…

[matinrohany]

Hi there

@Ghabel

I would appreciate it, thanks in advance.

I’ll try You’re totally welcome

@Ghabel

I was on the verge of losing my spouse in a car accident on a rainy night. Thank God it went well.

Wow… I’m glad everything’s fine now.

@Ghabel

I was having nightmares, could not sleep well and I was feeling depressed and thinking a lot about it.

Sorry to hear that…

@Ghabel

Feeling insecure, afraid of illness, and losing family members due to covid19.

Exactly

@Ghabel

News explosion, we don’t live on an island alone. Whether we like it or not, different news comes to us. Some of them have profoundly bad effects on our lives.
The economic problem, career stresses, and legal troubles are additional problems.

I believe you’re right. That’s why I don’t follow the news.

@Ghabel

It depends on the personality of the people. Suffering from trauma may make us stronger or weaker. How do you deal with the trauma, and how much can you accept that. The only way to tolerate is acceptance and then it brings us to the next level which is building a strong character and mentality.
After the trauma, we may think that we should appreciate those around us more and don’t take them for granted.

Well said

@Ghabel

irritate

irritation*

Thanks a lot for participating You did a perfect job. Enjoyed your professional views on the matter

[matinrohany]

Hi there, Raziye
Welcome to the forum

@Razieh_99

We all experience our share of hard times which we think cannot be overcome! But, when we look back, those problems don’t seem as terrible as we thought. Therefore, I prefer not to label them as traumas, because no matter how hard they were to deal with, they’re all water under the bridge now. I mean, the wounds are healed and only some scars are left!

Well said

@Razieh_99

In my experience, as an initial step, you have to know that person so well in order to recognize what can make them feel better

Totally agreed.

Thanks for participating Enjoyed your views on the matter

[Zeitoun1]

Hi everyone
The bad experience for me that made me frustrated and very sad was the death of my dad it was shocking to my family and me.
I did not like to see or talk to anybody after months, one of my friends asked me to do new work that I never had any experience with it I try to do it. It needed to focus on so I forgot my big sadly situation
I think it is a good idea for accepting some events. You can focus on a new experience and also stay far as the crowded place and learning how to accept the new situation

[mortezadorry]

@matinrohany

How have you been?

I have been fine better than before, I have injected second Sinofarm vaccine and now I feel like modern citizens who are first class

@matinrohany

I have to pay thrice for my rent… That was the worst feeling ever

Now I realized what was your worst experience there are some questions which you have to pay thrice

@matinrohany

Thank you so much for participating

Thanks heaps , I appreciate it