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تمرین رایتینگ - با موضوع« یک خاطره از آخرین مسافرتتان »

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تمرین رایتینگ - با موضوع« یک خاطره از آخرین مسافرتتان »
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#1

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سلام خدمت دوستان گرامی.

با چالش جدید نوشتاری همراه شما هستیم.

موضوع این تمرین خاطره ای از آخرین مسافرتتان است

ده تا 15 خط درباره یک خاطره از آخرین مسافرتتان بنویسید.

با عضویت در کانال تلگرامی گروه ، می تونید از آخرین فعالیت ها و چالش های گروه با خبر شید.

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#2

The last travel, I hadn’t had special diary. Except one bad thing that happened to us,( I and my husband). We had travel by our car, we want to go to Tehran, because of some reason we decided to pass from Ghom - Garmsar road. This road was a desert, and on that day ,the weather was strong wind, we continued anyway, all of a sudden we could not see where we were,
We are very scared. :fearful:
We kept the car on the edge of the road.
Some of cars kept their car in the middle of road, one of them( Zantia) didn’t have lights, suddenly
The truck stood about half a meter near (Zantia)with every difficulty,
A pride hit the truck with no attention.
We saw every thing, We could not do anything. My husband drove off the car and ran to Pride and shouted out of the car.
Fortunately, the man was alive in Pride.
I got a few pictures of this. In fact, we saw death in front of our eyes.
I show you some pictures.
20180918_185904
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20180918_185816

21 Likes

#3

Last week we went to Dorfak, a mountain in Gilan, near Roudbar. When we reached to our camping destination, It was rainy. Suddenly I looked back and I saw a Raibow. It was the closest rainbow to me I’ve ever saw. I could go near and touch it :smiley:

photo_2018-10-04_20-13-25

Because of the rain, we couldnt sleep outdoor. So we asked a villager to give us a room and they genourously agreed. The house was deep in the forrest. I dont know If they are happy there. They were far from civilization. However they had water and electricity. They also had a small old TV. We wanted to watch Perspolis vs Esteghlal Derby. However fortunaly there was no signal due to the bad weather. I say fortunaly cause I heard they didnt play well and the match was boring. So instead of watching TV, we played some games and talked to each other.

The next day, we woke up early at 4. It was a long journey so we needed to be ready fast and start our jouney at 5. At first it was so easy. However as we hiked further and further, we started to get exhausted. We needed to hike around 25 KM to reach to our destination. That day we walked for 17 hours! I had never experienced such a long hike. Finally we reached to the destinashion at 10PM.

Although I was very VERY tired, however I still think it was a very good journey. The jungle was beautiful. And although it was rainy, I liked it so much. walking in the rain makes me feel happy.

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Now I’m waiting for my next journey. We will go to Arfa Kouh. Its also a good place. I’ve been there before for two times. I can wait no longer to go there again :slight_smile:

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#4

What a beautiful scenery…

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#5

Thanks a lot. You described everything clearly. I proud you because you are doing what I love, I mean hiking. I love it but I don’t give it any priority. With these pictures I imagined that environment. Thank you bro. :slightly_smiling_face:

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#6

About two years ago we went to a village in countryside but I forget that villages name. It was strong snowing there. Snowing amount was about 50 centimeter but it wasn’t too cold. My family and I went for snow fighting and after that my brother told me stop there to take a photo and I was getting ready for taking it. suddenly my brother in law attacked to me from behind and jumped in front of me and shouted a snowball right to my face as you see in these pictures.
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It was the best snow fighting that I’ve ever had because my family all were playing from the youngest member to eldest one. we waited there about 3 hours and just played and had a fun. It’s incredible but we had a lunch right on the middle of the snow. even my child as you see.
20170203_141348

8 Likes

#7

The last my travel was about 10 days ago. My friend and I went to the north of Iran,in the Tonkabon City. I drove in the Candovan road about 4 hours.
My friend has identical twins. They are sons. They jumped up and down in my car and we were very injured.
The road was very beautiful and on the two sides of road were full of shivering yellow leaves. In the middle of way two cars had an accident!! We stayed in traffic. My frind’s mother had partial apoplexy. We have been decided to meet her. She is good now.لطفا ایرادهای گرامری رو بهم بگید ممنونم.

2 Likes

#8

Hi dear,
My last travel

There is no need to say in and before the name of city we don’t use the

You say sth that last for 4 hours so it’s better to use : I was driving and better to say I had been driving

Why injured? It makes me think that bad things happened for you, I suggest to use annoying

( it dosen’t need to use on) two sides of the road or both sides of the road

Why it is passive? We had decided
ما تصمیم گرفته بودیم

Thank goodness

1 Like

#9

سلام ala عزیز. خیلی خیلی لطف کردید متن منو خوندید و خیلی سپاسگزارم ایرادهای فراوانی ازم گرفتید🌷 حقیقتا من در کاربرد زمان ها مشکل دارم چون سالهاست که ننوشتم و یادم رفته!!! یکی دوتاش اشتباهات فاحشی بوده بدلیل عدم توجه(چون وقتی ایراد گرفتید فهمیدم که میدونستم ولی انگار توجه نکردم و از من بعید بود)!!!
بازم صمیمانه قدردانی میکنم از زحماتتون و سعی میکنم تکرار نکنم.:sweat: در ضمن دارم از زیبوک کتاب میخونم تا ساختار گرامریم بهتر بشه! اگه در خصوص زمانها راه دیگری میدونید لطفا منو راهنمایی کنید:tulip::tulip::tulip::tulip:

2 Likes

#10

سلام بانو، خواهش میکنم.

برای تسلط بر گرامر زمانی باید دوره هایی که مینی استوری و pov داره مثل انگلیسی قدرت و واقعی،… رو مطالعه کنید بخصوص pov ها خیلی کمک موثری هستند اگر صحیح مطالعه بشوند.

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#11

سلام عزیزم. سپاسگزارم از لطف بی منت شما:tulip::tulip::tulip::tulip:

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#12

In March last year we travelled to the Ramsar by our car.
It was a wonderful experience,
After a long time driving, we arrived In this city, first of all
We rented a house at the beach
and we stayed there for a week,
I liked the house and the weather, beacuse the weather was cool and pleasant and the
House was comfortable and cheerful, and we could see and hear the sound of the waves.
Some time I walked on the beach with my family and we
Watched the waves of the see
And I took some photos with my sister.
also we went sightseeing and
We got tickets and then we could visite the royal palace, it was located centre of a beautiful big garden, and it surrounded by verity of fruit trees ، it was interesting.
One of the days we took a cable
Car .
from the top there were a beautiful landscape from the sea and forest , it was amazing and I never forgot it . in the end
We felt really good and a great time.

1 Like

#13

دوستان سلام
لطفا بخوانید و ایراداتم رو بهم بگید ممنونم

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#14

قبل از هرچیز باید علایم نگارشی به درستی رعایت بشه. مرز جمله‌ها مشخص نیست که بشه تحلیل کرد

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#15

سلام
یعنی چی؟ منظورتونو متوجه نمیشم🤔

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#16

سلام عزیزم. نقطه و ویرگول و اینا منظورمه. مثلا من جملات اولو اصلا نفهمیدم کجا تموم شدن و جمله‌ی بعد از کجا شروع شده. اولین اصل رایتینگ رعایت علائم نگارشیه. اگه درست نوشته نشه خوانایی متنو پایین میاره و حتی اگه محتوا هم از لحاظ دستوری رعایت بشه، خواننده برای خوندن متن دچار مشکل میشه

3 Likes

#17

مرسی پری جان ، من حالا دوزاریم افتاد😅
بله شما درست می فرمائید سعی میکنم خودمو بهتر کنم
اما از لحاظ های دیگه چی ؟ منظورم گرامر هست ایا ایرادی نداشت؟

1 Like

#18

در اولین فرصت. الان دستم بنده ببخشید

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#19

Last year, in March…
آخر جمله‌ هم می‌تونه بیاد. درواقع حالت رسمیش اینه که آخر جمله قید زمان بیاد.

این یه عبارت قشنگ و نیتیوانه‌ (با این قیدی که ساختم :crazy_face:) است. آفرین واقعا :clap:

خیلی عالی. فقط اون we دوم لزومی نداره بیاد. حذف به قرینه میشه

جمله از نظر گرامری هیچ مشکلی نداره اما برای فعل see باید یه مفعول دیگه بیارید. صدای امواج دیده نمی‌شن
میشه اینجوری گفت:
We could see the waves and hear their sound

Sometimes

sea

وقتی فاعل یه نفر باشه یه بار که بیاد کافیه

We visited

at the center of

it was surrounded or it had been surrounded

a wide variety or many varieties

One day

On the top, from the sea and forest perspective, there was a…

At the end, we felt really good an had a great time.

رعایت حروف کوچک وسط جمله لازم و ضروریه. وسط جمله تنها موارد خاصی از جمله فاعل I، اسامی خاص، اسامی شهرها، ملیت‌ها، کشورها، قاره‌ها و … با حروف بزرگ نوشته می‌شن.
اول جمله هم تمام کلمات با حروف بزرگ نوشته می‌شن. عدم رعایت اصول نگارشی هم خیلی از این موارد رو به هم می‌ریزه. کیبوردها هوشمندن و به طور خودکار تصحیح می‌کنن. مثلا یه جا جمله تموم نشده اومدین خط بعدی و کیبورد فک کرده که شما جمله‌ی دیگه‌ای رو شروع کردین بخاطر همین با حرف بزرگ نوشته. مثل: :point_down:

بعد and کلمه با حرف کوچیک شروع میشه ولی شما چون اومدین خط بعدی we رو با حرف بزرگ نوشته.
یا در موارد دیگه بعد از گذاشتن نقطه دکمه‌ی space رو نگرفتین، اینجا کلمه بعدی اول یه جمله‌ است و باید با حرف بزرگ نوشته شه درحالی که اینطور نیست. مثل: :point_down:

نکته: بعد از علایم نگارشی مثل نقطه، ویرگول، دو نقطه، نقطه‌ویرگول و … باید فاصله قرار داد.

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#20

خییییییییلی ممنون پری خانوم بابت وقتی که گذاشتین و بررسی کردین ممنونم ازتون چه نکات جالب و خوبی رو بهم گفتین ، اصلاح میکنم و سعی میکنم نکاتی رو که بهم گفتین رو تماما در رایتینگ های بعدیم به کار ببرم
واقعا ممنونم عزیزم:hugs::heart:

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